Based in attachment theory, this therapy proposes that emotions are central to the experience of self and serve both adaptive and maladaptive functioning and are essential to therapeutic change. It is not emotions, but the individual's struggle to manage emotions that becomes problematic. Additionally, emotions are deeply connected to needs and aptly alert us to situations requiring action.

Some of the techniques used in emotionally focused therapy include:

1. Expand the emotional experience: when the client makes an emotional statement (i.e. "I feel out of control!"), the therapist will respond by asking the client to stay with the feeling, asking what it is like for them to be out of control, what it is like as they speak of it in the moment, how they feel as they speak, how they frame the experience, how they protect the self (if they did not, then what would occur), and finally validate the client's responses of his/or her experience (i.e. "It must be hard to feel scared") and then direct the partner/family members to engage as indicated (i.e. "And you feel she cannot protect you, tell her what that is like"; "You cannot feel safe when he hits walls"), with the ultimate goal of pulling emotional expression that engages compassion and connection, meeting unmet attachment needs.

2. Reframing the problem: the problem is reframed into a cycle, so the players are no longer victims of the situation, but rather they are on the same side looking into the cycle.

3. Restructuring the bond: when using this technique, the client and therapist will identify attachment needs and facilitate a change in interactions based on the identified needs to stop old patterns and engage in healthy ways.